I’m on the verge. And then there are the feelings. But I’m on the verge. My chart: Sun Mercury Mars in Cancer with a Moon Pluto conjunction in my First House. Once upon a time, when I was studying astrology (when I was in my 30s), but not reading charts for others yet, a Virgo astrologer told me that I needed to do readings for people. I NEEDED TO. As an outlet for that Moon Pluto emotional intensity. Had to aim it out. I didn’t know until she told me.

And another Virgo astrologer said to me: put on your sunglasses. When you are feeling that Moon Pluto, when you are feeling dark, put on your sunglasses. Don’t fight the energy. Be it. Not their words exactly, but it’s what I remember, and I know since then I’ve given similar advice to other Moon Pluto people. We go dark. Better to honor it. No. Not just honor it. Better to love it. Love that quiet, alone place. Love your melancholia, but melancholia isn’t the right word. Too drippy.

So what is the right word? What is this feeling that I associate so deep and hard with my own Moon Pluto conjunction. It’s a kind of… the metaphor I want to use is primer. The way people put primer on before the other makeup. There is a foundational Moon Pluto mood or way and it’s akin to primer. Everything else gets painted on top of it. And it feels like… space. Space waves. Part outer space, part ocean wave. And, also, it feels like that space or space wave is comforting us. It’s the feeling of the universe purring. Or a black hole.

Say to your dark: I love you. 

Moon Pluto or not, are you wearing your sunglasses? Are you sitting in the dark?

Obviously I went on to call my blog Moon Pluto Astrology and there’s even a Moon Pluto section in my second book. I took what I was given and I married it.

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The North Node in Aries is trine Venus retrograde in Leo. Fire to fire. There is life in these flames. Fireworks of hope. Maybe just a flicker but it’s there. I got a candle burning right now, as part of a spell, a ritual. And I can’t remember the last time I made my altar so elaborate, so beautiful, but Venus is in Leo. We go all out. We are generous. And even though Venus retrograde is a painful time (how ugly we feel, how rejected) the North Node in Aries joins forces with sweet Venus to make her feel loved and wanted and adored once again. They are traveling together. She’s not alone.

To be continued…
xo